Because She Didn't Follow Her Heart
by Lost and Insecure You Found Me
Summary: Katniss's mother didn't folow her heart. She became Mrs. Mellark instead of Mrs. Everdeen. Peeta's mother is Katniss's mother, and visa versa. Katniss's life messes up as she learns to cope with the death of her parents and her change in environment.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello again! Hehe, this is a new story that I've been thinking about posting for a while. After contemplating.. I decided to put it up! Hope you like it! **

**P.S. Katniss's mom in THIS story, is Peeta's mom in the ORIGINAL story. :)**

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><p>Chapter One<p>

I want to scream, but I know it'll only earn me a harsher beating. I sigh as I slowly crawl to the wall, the wall that has Prim trapped on the other side. I hold my breath as I knock three times, waiting to hear my sister do the same. When she does, I let out a shaky breathe.

_She's okay,_ I think to myself.

I hear the front door open; I jump up. "Daddy!" I scream, pounding on the door. It's sad, really. I'm a 15 year old girl screaming for her 'Daddy'. If you knew the circumstances, though, I think you'd understand. I've been locked in this room repeatedly since before I could talk; my sister in hers. If you think _your_ mom is mean, you'd kiss the ground she walks on after meeting mine. My mother is cruel; plain and simple. She gets entertainment from beating my sister and I. What does that? A psycho. That's who.

My door swings open; my father is steaming. He grabs my shoulders, "How long have you been in here?" he hisses.

I open my mouth, ready to tell him that this prison has had me trapped since before dawn. I see my wicked mother over my father's shoulder; I feel extremely threatened. "A few minutes," I lie. He groans as he rushes to Prim's room. My mother glares at me as I follow my father. The two are on the bed, hugging. Prim is crying into my father's shoulder as I sit on the bed with them.

"Make her stop, Daddy!" Prim sobs. He sighs as he basically hands her to me. "I don't like being locked in here."

"I know, sweetie," he lightly smiles. "I'll go talk to mom. It'll stop, I just need some time."

Prim slightly sits up, "How about we lock her in _her _room? So she'll see why we don't like it." I roll my eyes.

_Only an eleven year old…_

My father shakes his head as he wipes her tears with his thumb. He kisses both of our foreheads before he walks out the door.

Prim snuggles into me, "Daddy will make it stop, right Katniss?" Prim whimpers.

"I hope so," I whisper as I kiss her forehead. I squeeze her tight, "I really hope so."

Because, truly, my mother is the only person that makes me fear for my life. I would love the torture I've experienced for the past 15 years to stop. Anything would be better than this. _Anything._

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><p><strong>Sorry it's so short! I just wanted you to get a simple idea of what it's like. Hope you like it! I'll update in an hour or two.. haha.<strong>_  
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	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

I sit in class, tuning out the daily lecture on the Capitol. I tap my pencil on my desk as I talk to some friends. Well, we're not exactly close friends. But everyone needs a decent human being to talk to everyone once in a while, so it's nice chatting with people at the back of the room. My laughter is suddenly cut off by a sound that I have dreaded my entire life.

Every kid from the Seam jumps up and races out the door, leaving the Merchant's to contemplate their next move. I rush to the classroom I know as Prim's; I see her standing outside the door, looking for me. I swiftly grab her hand and lead her out the door. We run to the mines, where the normal amount of smoke coming out has surely tripled.

Prim and I stay toward the front, watching several men exiting the collapsing mine. The elevator-like contraption that takes them in and out of the ground is on full speed, making a disturbing thwacking sound. One by one, several families hug their loved ones that have graciously been spared. Every time a minute passes, it takes a piece of my hope with it.

"C'mon, Dad," I whisper over and over, hoping he'll magically pop out and hug Prim and I.

He doesn't.

Soon, the elevator stops clacking, signaling no one is left. The few grieving families standing by us gather themselves and stumble away together. I fall to my knees, Prim standing to my left.

"Where's Daddy?" Prim asks as she looks down at me with pained eyes.

"Dad's…" I trail off, trying to fight back tears. I can't afford to cry right now. "Dad's not coming home, Prim."

She shuts her eyes as she turns her head back to the mines. My head snaps to right at the sound of movement. I see a blonde woman on her knees, silently crying into her hands. She's a mere two feet away from me; I can hear her uneven breathing.

"Excuse me," I clear my throat. "Mrs. Mellark?" She looks up at me with puffy eyes. "Are-are you okay?" Wait, didn't _my_ dad just die? Shouldn't _she_ be comforting _me_? Not the other way around!

She gasps, "Oh! You poor child!" She takes me into her arms, rubbing my back as she sobs. "I'm so sorry," she whispers to me. She attempts to rock me back and forth, "My poor Katniss," she mumbles against my head. I want nothing more than to push her away and ask what the hell is going through her messed up head, but I don't. She slightly pulls back, "You're father was an amazing man," she whispers. I nod my head, unsure if her sanity has recently left her or not. She touches my cheek as the tears coming down her face increase in speed, "You look so much like him," she whimpers. I stare at her hand, which she quickly removes. "If you need anything, anything at all, I'll be more than happy to help, okay?" she hugs me again before I can even nod. Standing behind her is her youngest child, Peeta Mellark. He's in my grade, and I've had only a handful of experiences with this boy…

"Mom," he whispers. "I-I think we should go now..." She tightens her grip and I nearly stop breathing. He kneels down next to us, putting a hand on her shoulder, "It's getting late. We should go home." He turns to me. "As should you, Katniss."

I nod my head and eye his mother, who slightly lets go. She tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear. "You know where to find me," she whispers. She stands, still sniffling, and looks at my sister, "Goodbye Primrose," she smiles. Prim doesn't even move. Mrs. Mellark fades into the darkness without another word. 

Peeta turns to me, and smiles. I don't even attempt to fake one. He grabs my hand and squeezes it, "You'll be okay," he whispers. His hand pulls mine up to his lips. "I promise," he mumbles against my skin, right before he kisses it.

I don't know why I do it. I'm guessing I just wanted someone with a sane mind with me. Or maybe I had enough of holding all the pain in. I'd like to think that I just want comfort, nothing more… I reach over and wrap my arms around his neck, sobbing. His arms engulf me as he squeezes me, whispering reassuring words. I snuggle into his neck, his warmth seeping from his shirt to mine. He pulls my into his lap as he rocks back and forth.

"It's alright, Katniss," he mumbles against my hair. "I'm here."

I think those are the most calming words I've heard in years.

"Don't leave me," I whimper.

"Never," he whispers, following with a kiss on my cheek.

He actually puts my mind at rest. I feel like I'm going to be okay, that everything is going to be alright. Until my mother stomps over.

"Get up!" she hisses. "You poor thing!" she shrieks. For a second, I think she's addressing Prim or me.

_Wrong._

She grabs Peeta's wrist, "Get away from her! You don't realize how dirty she his!" He stands there, staring at her, awestruck. He's probably thinking the same thing as me:

_Why is my mother so insensitive? _

She begins dragging Prim and I away, a disgusted look on her face. She didn't look one bit upset about my father's passing.

_My father's passing. Wow… he's actually gone…_

When we reach the house, we're quickly locked into our rooms. I almost don't have the energy to knock back to Prim. But I know she'll start crying, worried that something has happened to me. I stumble to the wall, and answer back. I swear I can hear her sigh.

I flop on the bed. My body feels numb, as does my heart. With my father gone, my mother will be able to beat us without someone _'nagging' _her.

If it weren't for Prim, I would have jumped in that mine with my dad.


	3. Chapter 3

**It's terrible... just saying D: Okay, don't hate _too_ much. I like the beginning... but the ending drags on. Thanks for reading and reviewing! **

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><p>Chapter Three<p>

It's been two days. Two days since my father has died. The ceremony honoring all those that were lost was yesterday. I recognized a few people, but not many. I probably knew them all, but was too absorbed in my own grief to even give them a second glance.

The funeral for my father is today. My mother didn't put much effort into it. To be honest, I don't think she even cares. She's just glad she's getting free food and attention from it all.

_What a pig._

I pull at my black dress as we approach the gravesite. My father's grave reads:

"Loving Father and Husband."

It's not too big. A few families that were close to my father came; they didn't stay long, all we're too afraid of my mother.

When one family came, it was semi shocking, semi expecting. The Mellark's didn't even look too upset, excluding Mrs. Mellark that is. I swear, it's like she and my father were married instead of the witch and him. She looks like she's going to just break down and die. I frown at Peeta, who is watching me with pity in his eyes.

Prim had prepared a speech, but her aching heart was too much for her. She dropped to her knees as she broke out in sobs. I tried to hug her, but my mother got to get first. She hissed something in her ear, which caused Prim to scream. I shut my eyes, and am now being dragged away by my mother. I don't bother fighting, but Prim had other ideas. She screams, thrashes, hits, _bites_, and looks like a crazed animal. I want to escape as my mother lets go of my wrist, until her hand makes contact with Prim's cheek. I yelp for Prim, which earns me a glare and a threat. I shut my eyes and nod.

"You ingrates," she huffs as she begins dragging us again.

No one does anything. They only gave us sorrowful looks. Like always. She drags us the long way. We end up behind the merchant's homes.

"This is where I should be living!" she groans. She whips around, causing Prim to fall. I quickly pick her up and turn to our mother. She begins screaming at us just because she can. I know people hear, they just aren't doing anything.

"Ma'am!" I hear someone scream. "You need to keep it down!" the man in white hisses.

_Uh oh… Mama made a Peacekeeper mad. Ha, this should be interesting…_

You see, most Peacekeepers in District 12 are pretty nice; they don't enforce the rules too much. Others are just mean. They don't necessarily pound us to follow the rules-they are all very aware of my family and the Hawthorne's illegal hunting. There are those few, though, that if you rub the wrong way… well, let's just say it's not pretty.

"You're bothering a lot of people! We have gotten several complaints." I can't see my mother's face, but I know it's not very happy, nor attractive. "Don't you roll your eyes at me!" the man snaps.

They continue fighting, their shouting getting louder and louder by each passing minute. I hold Prim, my back to them, covering her ears. I hear a shot. I gasp as I take in my surroundings.

"I told her to keep it down," he shrugs his shoulders. "She was getting on my nerves." He turns around and shouts back at us, "You girls go on and get home!"

_This_is what I meant by not pretty.

I look down at my mother's bloody body. I want to scream but I can't find my voice; Prim finds it for me. She screams bloody murder. People begin approaching the horrifying scene. I don't know what to do. My mother was just shot because she got on someone's nerves. If that was even legal, she would have been dead _long_ before I was born. As the circle of people around us grow, the questions ring in my ears. Prim has stopped screaming; I can't look away from my _dead _mother.

"It was a Peacekeeper," I say. They fall silent, all eyes on me. "My mother was yelling at him and-and-and he just shot her." Murmurs break out; no doubt the whole District will know about this before dawn. "We just came from my father's funeral," I mumble.

They all feel sorry for me; I can see it in the way they look at me. Some are from town, others are my neighbors. A few nod in the direction of three people dressed in all white. I reach behind me, grabbing onto a shaking Prim.

"Katniss," Prim whimpers. "What are we going to do?" I can _hear_ the worry in her voice. "Mother and Daddy are…" She doesn't have to say it; I think we all know what she means. "Katniss," she warily mumbles. "Katniss, they're coming." I look to see the three Peacekeepers heading toward us, stopping to talk to a few bystanders on the way. I shut my eyes, trying to figure out how I can get us out of this. She tugs on my arm, "Do something," she begs. "Anything!" she shrieks.

_Anything._

My eyes snap open.

_That's it!_

My grip on Prim's wrist tightens as I pull us from the crowd. I more or less know where I'm going; I've been there before, just not on my own.

"Where are we going?" Prim whispers as we rush down the back streets of town. "They're right behind us!" she shrieks.

I try to block her out as I evaluate the backyards. "No," I whisper, shaking my head when a house isn't familiar. I groan; my memory is failing me.

I jump, gasping, as Prim screams again. I look over at her; I see one of the Peacekeepers has caught up with us.

_He's trying to take her from me._

I growl at him as I rip Prim away from him, putting myself between the two.

"Don't let him take me!" Prim cries.

Before either of us can make a move, a voice makes itself know, "Excuse me," a female says from behind me. The three of us turn to a woman walking down her porch and toward us. "What are you doing to these children?" she hisses at the Peacekeeper. When she reaches us, she smiles at me, "Hello, Katniss," Mrs. Mellark says with a nod.

_I guess my memory didn't fail me…_

"You said if I needed anything…" I trail off.

Her face turns serious; she must have already heard about…_it_. Her gaze travels from Prim and I to the man in white. Her arm moves to the right, gesturing she wants to talk further down the street-away from Prim and I. Being respectful, the younger man complies.

I look at Prim, making sure she's okay. Her gaze is fixed on Mrs. Mellark, though. The conversation between the woman and the Peacekeeper is the exact opposite of my mother's; calm, controlled, and quiet.

After a few minutes, Mrs. Mellark comes back to us; the Peacekeeper stays in his spot, watching us.

"Come on," she tells us. I raise my eyebrows, curious as to want just went down. She looks at Prim, "You either come with me, or you go with him." At this, Prim nearly clings herself to the poor woman. She smiles as she hugs Prim back, "Let's go inside. You two are probably still shaken up from today's events, am I right?" We both nod, and follow her to the back of the bakery. She opens the door, letting Prim go first. I stare at the inside of the building, regretting my actions already. She pushes me forward, "There is nothing to fear here," she whispers; I nod my head as I follow her up the stairs.

We walk through a hallway and end up in a large room. A man and three boys around my age are in here too. I swallow hard as they stare at us.

"Honey," the man whispers. He's the woman's husband; he's Mr. Mellark. "What-"

She holds her hand up, "We have guests." The four standing there give us confused faces. "Katniss and Prim will be staying with us for a while. They... need a place to stay."

"Hazel," Mrs. Mellark whispers. "Don't you think we should talk about this?"

She rolls her eyes; she grabs Prim's hand and smiles down at her. "I'll show you to your room," she beams. The two basically skip away.

My head hurts. What the hell is going on? I'm standing in the Mellark household. Who would have thought _that_ would happen? Not me. I slowly look to my left and see four pairs of blue eyes staring at me. Out of surprise and fright, I yelp as I run in the direction Prim.

I'm soon in a hall with quite a few doors. I see Mrs. Mellark and Prim making light conversation, possibly waiting for me. I know the other Mellark's are behind me; they can't take a quiet footstep to save their lives.

Mrs. Mellark looks up at me and smiles. She taps on her chin, contemplating something. She points to a door, "You two can stay here."

"But that's Peeta's room!" one of the three boys says.

Mrs. Mellark sighs at her son's comment, "Yes, Rye, I know."

"Where's he going to stay then?" the same boy asks.

"Since you're so concerned," she grins, "He can stay in your room."

"Mom!" he whines. "Why can't he stay with Julian?"

Mrs. Mellark shakes her head, "Because your older brother was smart enough to keep his mouth shut, that's why." Rye groans, snickers coming from his eldest brother. "You can change the sheets then, Julian," she instructs.

He nods his head, kissing his mom's head before entering the room, "Sure thing, Ma," he smiles. He exits shortly after, "Done," he smiles with dirty sheets in his arms. He walks past us, smiling and nodding at Prim and I.

"Let's just hope Peeta didn't leave a stain," Rye mumbles.

I cover my mouth to stifle a laugh. Yes, it was mean and uncalled for, but it was pretty funny. I can't believe I'm close to laughing on a day like this...

Peeta glares at his brother, "I haven't wet the bed since, like, forever."

Rye rolls his eyes, "I was talking about a different stain." He nudges his brother's shoulder, "If you know what I mean."

"Ew," I scoff.

He grins at me, "You're the one sleeping there, princess. I believe it's caused by y-" he's cut off by an elbow in his stomach.

Mrs. Mellark sighs, "You girls should get to bed. It's getting late." Prim yawns and nods her head, sweetly thanking her before entering the room. She looks at me, "You too, Katniss."

I eye the room carefully, "I-I..."

She rolls her eyes, "Peeta doesn't have _that_ many germs, darling." Rye laughs; Peeta groans. She turns to her youngest son, "I'm not embarrassing you, am I?" He eyes me and slightly blushes. She looks from me to him. "Go to bed," she whispers. "I have to talk to your father." I awkwardly stand there, waiting for some peace and quiet. She walks to her husband, their conversation quickly starting. I groan, knowing I'm the subject.

After a while, the two walk away, deep in dialogue.

Rye slightly smiles, "Sorry if I was… making it awkward." I shake my head, not really meaning it. "Just trying to lighten the mood," he sighs. He stares at me; I raise my eyebrows. He points to my dress, "What's on your dress?"

I nearly scream as I look down. I have my mother's blood splattered on me. On my clothing. The last thing I'll have of her is a dress covered in her red body fluid. My face loses its color as I swallow hard.

"N-n-nothing," I stumble out.

He nods his head, understanding I don't want to talk, then pats Peeta's back, "I'm going to bed," he whispers. "I'll see you two in the morning I guess…" I nod my head as he passes me. "Goodnight, guys," he smiles. I nod my head, refusing to say anything.

Peeta and I hear the door shut, but I still make no attempt to start a conversation. I begin shaking, feeling the sobs returning. Peeta's arms open up, offering a safe haven for me. I stare at him.

_He looks so comforting, so warm, so… so…_

I take a step forward. Before I can contemplate it, Peeta takes a step, meeting me half way. His arms rap around me; I feel safe again. After a few minutes, I pull back. He looks confused, but I shake my head.

"I'm sorry," I whisper. He shakes his head, confused. "I-I… I shouldn't be bothering you…"

"You're not bothering me," he mumbles. He pulls a piece of my hair behind my ear. "You can always talk to me, you know." I stare at him, more confused than him

_Why so touchy with him? We've only talked a handful of times. I'm still thinking about the other day when he held me while I cried, I can't do that again. Why would he hold me? Why was he there? Why was his mother there? Why… why do they even care?_

I nod my head and sigh. I turn to Peeta's room, and begin walking in.

"Goodnight, Katniss," he whispers.

I stop, "Goodnight, Peeta."

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><p><strong>Tell me what you think... PLEASE tell me if you have suggestions... SO need them right now.. haha.<strong>

**Review! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Omg! I'm sorry it took so long... I was kind of stuck... I'd love to have people give me ideas for the story! I really appreciate reviews and greatly accept feedback. I hope you like it! **

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><p>Chapter Four<p>

I have merely lain in this bed all night. It is strange for two reasons; one, it is soft and comfortable, making it foreign to me; two, it belongs to Peeta Mellark, making it uncomfortable in a way. Unlike me, Prim has been asleep all night; like me, yesterday's events have drained all her energy.

Over the course of the night, I have accepted the fact that my parents are dead. I have come to the realization that Prim and I are orphans; we have no family but ourselves. What I just can't acquiesce, though, is that I'm sleeping in the Mellark's house; in a Mellark's room; in a Mellark's bed; under a Mellark's blankets; with my head on a Mellark's pillow.

It's absurd; idiotic on their part, really. Seriously, who takes in two stray Seam kids? I've been repeating different versions of this question in my head all night.

_Why would they let two strange kids in their home? Why would a woman let two girls she hardly knows, stay in her son's bedroom? Why would they be so welcoming to two misfits? So kind? So generous? So-_

"Katniss?" I hear Prim's innocent voice whisper. She lays beside me, wrapped in both my arms and the sheets.

I squeeze her tighter, "Yes, Prim?"

"What time is it?"

"Uh…" I look around the unfamiliar room, trying to locate a clock. "I don't know…"

She yawns, "Do you think it's time to get up?"

"You're up, aren't you?" She smiles, sits up and stretches. Her stomach grumbles loudly; I laugh, "Hungry, are we?"

She sheepishly grins, "Just a bit…" Her stomach makes the same gargling sound. She laughs, "Okay, maybe a lot…" I shake my head as I stand up, Prim shortly following. "Now, how to get to the kitchen…?"

I poke Prim's head, "Don't be rude!" She swats my hand away, giggling. "I'm serious, Prim. We're guests here. We'll be lucky if we're even fed." She frowns; I sigh. "Be polite, you hear me?"

She nods her head; "I'll use all the manners I know of!" she smiles brightly.

_Only Prim can get excited about using manners…_

I smile at her and hear a loud, "Breakfast is ready!" and the scampering of feet in the hall.

Prim laughs, "Those boys are like Lady when I'm about to feed her!" I laugh at her comparison to the Mellark boys and her pet goat; she gasps, "Lady!"

I lean down a bit, rubbing her cheek soothingly, "Lady is probably fine, Prim. You know Gale would never let them take her." I grin.

_Gale! I need to talk to him! Ugh… the only normal person in my life! Well, not normal… just the closest thing I have to a friend; besides Madge, that is._

I turn to my right, hearing a soft knock at the door. "Come in," Prim says politely.

Mrs. Mellark walks in, "Good morning, girls. Would you like some breakfast?" I open my mouth to decline, but Prim's hunger beats me; her stomach growls once again. Mrs. Mellark laughs along with Prim, "That would be a yes! Come on, now."

She guides us down the different halls and one stairway that lead into their kitchen. I stop at the door and take in my surroundings. There is a long table in the middle of a decent sized kitchen- extremely large compared to mine, though. It isn't the bakery kitchen, but it's still a nice kitchen. Prim and Mrs. Mellark join the three boys and Mr. Mellark, who are all bantering as they serve themselves pancakes.

I watch as Prim quickly fits in with the family. She is blonde with blue eyes like the rest of the Mellark's. They all laugh and joke as they begin their meal. Prim easily makes conversation, looking like she's been with them all her life. Prim completes the perfect merchant family. She's the little girl they never had.

If I were to walk away right now, I know Prim would forever be in loving hands. I can see how they enjoy her presence; how she enjoys theirs. I have no doubt that they would take her in. I mean, they let Prim and I stay the night. That's crazy enough. But, the Mellark's are amazingly kind people- as you can see! They would surely adopt her…

I sigh.

They don't even notice my absence. Why would they? I came in last night, why would they all jump up screaming at each other for starting their meal without me? If I say nothing, I could go without socializing. Peeta looks up, grabbing some syrup; our eyes meet.

_So much for not socializing…_

He doesn't move; his hand reaching for the syrup; staring at me; his mouth slightly open. Mrs. Mellark furrows her eyebrows at him, and then follows his gaze.

"Oh!" she frowns. "Katniss, dear, come sit!" They all turn their heads to me; I swallow hard. "We won't bite, darling."

Prim smiles, "It's super delicious, Katniss!" she says with a mouthful of chewed up pancake. I slightly laugh, but quickly cover my mouth. She grins, gesturing to the seat next to her, "Come, sit!" she giggles, pieces of her pancake falling out.

My eyes widen, realizing this isn't the time nor place, "Primrose!" I shriek. "What did I tell you about _not_ being rude?"

She frowns, "Sorry," she mumbles, _still_ with food in her mouth.

I roll my eyes as I walk over to her, helping her wipe her mouth. I look at Mrs. Mellark, "Please accept my dearest apologies. Prim isn't used to the privilege of… mass amounts of food at one time. She just got carried away with it."

Mrs. Mellark shakes her head, "Katniss, please. I have raised three _boys_. Having Prim chew with her mouth full is _nothing _compared to what these three have put me through," she says glaring at her sons.

Prim giggles, "You see! I'm not that bad!"

Mrs. Mellark smiles, "Not bad at all."

"Never said that," I huff.

Prim pulls the chair next to her back, "Sit!" she smiles. I do so and stare at all the food on the table. A couple of stacks of pancakes lay in the middle, ready to be eaten. The syrup in two differnent bottles on the two ends of the table. "They're super good," Prim grins.

I nod my head, grabbing the top pancake and pour as little syrup as possible. I slowly eat, tuning out the cheery conversation. I just can't seem to go back to normal so quickly like my little sister. Prim is like a ray of sunshine, though. She can truly bring out the best in everything, no matter what situation. Still, our mother was _murdered_ yesterday… and she's laughing with complete strangers. I know our mother was a witch and beat us, but she was still our mother! And father… he was the one that cared about us; the one that loved us; made sure we were as happy as we could manage. How… how could she be this… this _normal_ three days after his passing?

"Ow," I groan as Prim elbows me in the stomach. I turn my head to her, "Yes?" She nods her head forward; I look in that direction and see Mrs. Mellark carefully watching me. "Yes?" I repeat. I see that everyone's staring at me.

_How long has she been trying to get my attention…?_

Mrs. Mellark looks worried, "Katniss are you alright?"

_Oh, yes. My parents are dead, I have no place to live, I'm eating with a bunch on strangers and I don't think I feel very comfortable sleeping in Peeta Mellark's bed again. Darling, I'm just peachy! _

"Fine," I grumble.

"Honey," she says carefully. "You've just been picking at your food. Are you sure your fine?" I clench my teeth, wanting to scream my thoughts out loud. "Did you get enough sleep?"

"No," I mumble.

"What do you mean you didn't get enough sleep?" Prim frowns. I turn my head to her as she continues, "I've never slept on such a comfortable bed in all my life! How can you _not_ sleep on that thing?"

I sharply exhale, "I don't know, Prim," I say, careful not to sound _too_ mean; she's my sister after all…

"But it's so comfy!" Prim chirps.

I stare at my plate, "I didn't feel particularly comfortable sleeping in a stranger's bed, Prim." I poke the little pancake left with my fork, "Especially Peeta Mellark's bed," I mumble.

Prim frowns, "Oh," she whispers.

My eye's flicker to left; Peeta's bright blue eyes are warily watching me, probably waiting for me to lash out and murder him. I mean, isn't that what all the stupid merchants think of me? A cold blooded killer? Just because I hunt _animals_ for food, doesn't mean I'm going to chop off someone's head for the hell of it….

"I think he heard the last part," Prim whispers.

The grip I have on my fork strengthens; Peeta and I keep our stare. This boy is the reason I stayed up all night. I probably would have gotten sleep if it weren't _his _bed I was sleeping on. Peeta Mellark has been raiding all that I know since before I was five. You could say we used to be friends; I guess that makes us… acquaintances? Not entirely strangers… not entirely friends… That fits the description pretty well.

I am aquaintances with the Mellark's.

I _used _to be friends with the Mellark's.

Before Peeta over here became a complete jackass to me, I used to be _really_ good friends with the Mellark's.

We continue staring at each other, no one paying much attention to us.

"Especially Peeta Mellark's?" he whispers.

"_Especially_ Peeta Mellark's," I hiss. He scoots his chair closer to mine- he is on my left, Prim is on my right.

"What happened to being friends?" he mumbles.

I roll my eyes, "I gave up on that a long time ago."

He shakes his head, "_You_ gave up on being friends?" I nod; he rolls his eyes, "And what about me?"

"What about you?"

"What am I?"

"You're the reason I was tormented."

"What… what's that supposed to mean?" he whispers. I grab another pancake and continue eating. "Katniss?" I ignore him. He squeezes my elbow, "Katniss, talk to me." I jerk my arm, forcing his hand off of me. He roughly pulls my chair toward him, "Katniss, you're scaring me. What do you mean tormented?"

"You know exactly what I mean," I snarl and continue cutting my pancakes.

He grabs my arm, "No, I don't."

I hear someone loudly clear their throat. We both turn to the source of the sound to see Rye standing a few feet away. "Peeta," he says. "Mom says you have to clean up…" I look around the table and see that we are the only ones left.

Peeta drops my arm, "Yeah, of course." He smiles, standing up as he begins clearing the table.

He says nothing, even though I don't move. Even after he finishes cleaning, and I'm alone, I don't move. I sit there for who knows how long. It's not until Prim squeezes a conversation out of me do I actually feel calm again.

You see, talking about Peeta… it makes me think of when life was bearable; when I had somewhere to escape to besides the woods. It makes my remember having a place to go when I was beat so hard that I didn't have any tears left. I hate to dwell on the days when I turned to Peeta Mellark for reassurance. I think that's why I let him comfort me the other night. I was so used to crawling to him for peace and ease. It's why I felt safe for the first time in years. It's why his few words meant the world to me.

Having Peeta hold me… it… it made my vulnerability both fade and strengthen.

I don't want to depend on Peeta Mellark for amenity.

But I know no better way to feel safe then fall asleep in his arms.

He hurt me, but I think the only way to heal… is to forgive Peeta and have him there for me again.

_Can I really forgive him, though?_

_Of course I can forgive him…_

_Can I trust him again?_

_Of course I can trust him again…_

_Can I be friends with him again?_

_Of course I can be friends with him again…_

_Can I love him again?_

_I… well… he… I… love?_

_I'll have to work on that one._


	5. Chapter 5

**Don't hate me! I know I haven't updated in forever, but I truly have been busy! All last week was extremely packed with things; I had school and I went on vacation for 5 days... I didn't get back until yesterday at around 3 AM and I slept all day. Today I used my time to write this chapter and I'm going to try and update 'Making Friends With The Baker's Son' too. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. Tell me what you think, and I'm sorry if it's not good D: **

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><p>Chapter Five<p>

After another awkward meal, I volunteer to clean up. Mrs. Mellark insists that one of the boys will take care of it; I counter that I am a guest, lucky to even be here. She reluctantly complies, and I am soon by myself for the first time today. Since this morning, I wanted to go see Gale… but I haven't found the time or energy to leave this house. I sigh as I finish the last dish, knowing I have to go back to that bed; Peeta's bed.

_Why does he have to be involved with everything?_

I groan as I slip up the stairs. Tonight will more than likely be a restless one. I've decided to use the time to think over the situation with Peeta. I make it to the bedroom, barely able to put my hand on the knob when my isolation is shattered; I feel a hand on my shoulder.

_Don't be Peeta, don't be Peeta, don't be Peeta, don't be-_

"Hey, Katniss," Rye smiles.

_Phew…_

He holds up a bag to me, "Here," he says handing it to me.

I carefully take it, "What is it?" I whisper.

He shrugs his shoulders, "Some clothes."

I open up the bag; see different shirts, pants and dresses. "Where'd you get these?"

He grins, "My dad and Peeta went in to town and bought you and Prim some clothes."

"But-but… why?"

He chuckles, "Because you can't stay in that forever," he says gesturing to my black dress. I swallow hard, remembering the reason for wearing this dress in the first place. "You can change into some of the pajamas for tonight; they're probably more comfortable than that."

I shake my head, "You guys are too nice for your own good."

He rolls his eyes as he takes a step back, "Same old Katniss," he huffs as he heads toward his room. "See you in the morning."

Prim and I need the clothes, yes; I can take their money, no. I already owe this family my life... How can I take more? I guess I'll just have to work it off.

I groan in frustration as I turn back to the door. I quickly slip into the room, shutting the door behind me. I stand frozen at the scene before me. I furrow my eyebrows in confusion; grit my teeth in anger; frown in disappointment; and sigh, realizing my sister has a piece of me in her.

She lies on the bed, wrapped in Peeta's arms. Her face is buried in his chest; his chin is on her head. They truly look like siblings. My stomach twists at the possibility of my sister being sucked into the misleading ways of Peeta Mellark.

I grab a baggy shirt and pants from the bag and dump the bag on the floor. I slowly creep to the bathroom and change. Knowing there is no chance of me sleeping in this room, or sleeping at all for that matter, I walk outside the room. I wander the halls until I make it to the living room.

I plop down in a lying position on one of the couches and look around the room. After about a minute, it gets overbearingly boring. I begin thinking about Peeta. That conversation at breakfast questions my present assumptions about him. I can't shake the thought that he was actually _genuinely_ concerned about me.

Why would he care, though? I mean, he did care about be once before…

At one point in time, we were each other's rocks. Peeta and I used to be affected by one another's discomfort or stress levels; we helped each other through all our pain and suffering.

Well, that was until Peeta became the cause of a whole different kind of agony and misery. I honestly didn't know your heart could hurt that much.

_Tormented._

Tormented is the word I told Peeta to describe what I went through. His face was priceless. He probably thought I was being a big baby when we stopped being friends. It's not like there was anything else I could do. I had lost the only person I loved outside of my family.

"Katniss?" I hear her soft voice yawn.

I sigh of relief, glad she's no longer with the ever-present burden in my mind.

"Yes, Prim?" I ask.

"I-I... I had a nightmare," she whimpers.

I sit up, "Oh, Prim, come here." She runs into my arms; I soothingly rock her as I pet her hair lovingly. "Everything's going to be all right," I coo. "I'm here; nothing is going to hurt you."

"It was about daddy," she cries into my chest.

I almost break down with her.

I squeeze her tighter, "I'm here, Prim. I'm here."

She looks up at me with longing eyes, "Tell me daddy's story." I swallow hard, not wanting to retell the bedtime story my father once told. I begin shaking my head, but she stops me with her pleads. "It used to put me to bed," she sniffles.

I nod my head and quickly try to piece together his distant words that made an old Seam folktale.

"Once there lived a boy and a girl," I begin softly. "Who were destined to be together, but couldn't marry, for where they were from didn't allow them. The boy was from the Seam, the girl was from town. He was named Otto; she was named Hazel."

I go on to tell the story of these two 'love birds' and how they grew apart and together. The storyline is long, but the summary isn't. The two are, as the story goes, destined to be together.

Hazel was in love and engaged with someone else when she met Otto, but couldn't help the feeling of lust and passion toward him. They grew closer and closer until they confessed their love for one another. Hazel told her parents about being in love with a coal miner and her refusal to marry the other man named Henry.

Hazel's parents were furious; they forbad her to marry him. She obeyed her parents' wishes, and married the man named Henry. Otto was not only furious, but extremely heartbroken.

His one true love had married someone else.

Otto had nothing to do but marry someone else.

The two were obviously unhappy with their lives, and later their love rekindled. The two ran away together, not caring about what people thought.

"And the two lived happily ever after," I finish. I look down and slightly smile at a sleeping Prim. I know I could have stopped half way through when Prim had fallen asleep, but my father _always_ finished the story, so I knew I had to as well.

"My mother used to tell me the same story," I hear a voice mumble. My head snaps to the door way to see Peeta leaning on the doorframe with his arms crossed. I say nothing, merely staring at him. He slowly makes his way to me and leans down when he reaches me. I feel the need to scream when his hand brushes against my arm, but I don't even move. His arms wrap around Prim and gradually lift her off of me. "I'll take her to your room," he tells me.

"_Your_ room," I silently correct him.

I finally breathe when he leaves the room, but nearly choke on air when he returns. He resumes his position at the doorway as he continues watching me. We don't take our eyes off each other as the time slowly passes.

After a while, Peeta breaks the silence. He drops his arms, shaking his head, "What happened to us?" When I don't answer, he takes slow-but loud- steps toward me. "We were best friends," he says when he's halfway to me. I stay silent, but continue staring at him. He sits in front of me on the couch as I wrap my arms around my legs and pull them closer. "What happened?" I squeeze my legs tighter as he moves slightly closer. "What happened?" he repeats.

"You know what happened," I snap. He shakes his head. "Yes, you do."

He sighs, "No, Katniss, I really don't. One day, we were talking and laughing like best friends; the next, you wouldn't even look at me."

I stare at the lamp behind him, "I couldn't look at you," I mumble.

I feel him move closer, "Why? Why couldn't you look at me?"

"I… I just couldn't."

"I don't understand," he whispers. "I don't know what I did that made you so upset. We were 12 years old; then, all we fought over was who ate what, and then we'd be mad for 10 minutes at the most." He shakes his head, "We haven't talked in years, Katniss. What happened? Was it something I did?"

"Of course it was something you did," I snort. He stays silent; I shake my head. "Tormented," I mumble.

"Katniss, that word scares me coming out of your mouth. I know when you say it, you mean it. Please tell me what happened." I look back at him, his face full of worry. "I want to know what I did; I want to make it right."

"You can't make it right."

He throws his hands up in frustration, "Why, Katniss? Why? All I want to do is help you! I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for what I did. I'm truly sorry I hurt you and I'm sorry we aren't friends anymore. But you know what? I can't help you unless you tell me what I did!"

As he continues his rant, I finally do as he asked, "You dumped me," I whisper.

"I don't get why you can't tell me, Katniss! What did I-" He falls silent; his mouth hangs open, finally registering what I said something. "I did what?"

"You dumped me," I repeat.

He furrows his eyebrows, "I didn't _dump_ you."

I ignore his comment as I stare over his shoulder once again, "You dumped me for your other friends."

He shakes his head, "Katniss, are you saying we stopped being friends because I made new friends?"

"No, you had other friends when we were friends."

"Then why did me making _other_ friends… upset you?"

"It didn't upset me," I say quickly.

He sighs, "Well… what did upset you?"

"You didn't say anything."

He looks at me with confusion, "Say anything… when…?"

"You didn't defend me."

"Defend you? What are you talking about?"

My anger levels grow as his stupidity levels grow. I grit my teeth, "I'm talking about you and your stupid friends trash talking me."

"Trash talking you? What are you-?"

I punch the couch's cushion as I look at him, "I'm talking about you being a jack ass!" I hiss. "I'm talking about you making friends with the people that absolutely loath me, and helping them find reasons to hate me. I'm talking about you never wanting to look at me or hang out with me in public. I'm talking about you drifting from me because you didn't want to be seen with me. I'm talking about losing the one person I trusted; I cared for; I loved. I'm talking about my heart breaking into a million pieces because all of a sudden I wasn't good enough for you." My breathing becomes more labored as the tears build up in my eyes, "I'm talking about losing my best friend because I'm not blonde with blue eyes."

He shakes his head, his face bewildered, "Katniss, I don't care that you're not from town! You know that!"

"No," I shake my head. "I _knew_ that." I sniffle, trying to fight back the tears, "We were 12, and my mother's beatings had gotten worse. I hadn't talked to you in days; all I needed was to hear you say it was all going to be okay. I looked for you at the end of school outside and, instead of finding you, I found your friends. All they could say was how disgusting I was; how many germs I had; how hunting made me a murderer; that I wasn't loved by anyone because my mother hit me; and so many more insulting things that made me feel like dirt.

"I tried not to let them get to me; you had always told me that their words meant nothing. It wasn't just the kids in our grade, though. There were older kids, too. All of them were saying the same kind of things. They circled me as their harsh mockery and ridicule continued. They made me feel like a bug trying to be squished. I rolled my eyes at everything they said, trying to hide the pain."

I take a deep breathe, trying to calm myself, "When I heard your voice, I thought it would be over soon. I thought that you were going to make them all stop; get them to leave me alone. But you didn't. You said nothing. You let them laugh at me." My lip quivers, "You let them torment me."

He is frozen, "Katniss, I-"

"No," I interrupt him. "Don't tell me you didn't know or that you tried to help. I saw you. When everyone left, I saw you standing there. I was on the floor, crying, and you were just standing there, staring at me. The one time I was depending on someone to help me, you let me down. What was I supposed to do, Peeta? Huh? Was I just supposed to forget that you did _nothing_ to help me? Was I supposed to laugh and play and talk to you the next day like nothing happened?"

I look back to him. He looks hurt; on the verge of crying. "I saw you with Gale," he whispers. "I saw you with him that morning."

I continue taking deep breathes to keep me from crying, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"I thought he had replaced me."

I furrow my eyebrows, "Wh-what?"

He ignores my comment and shuts his eyes; his fists clench, "If I would have known," he says through gritted teeth. "If I would have known it was you they were hurting..." His eyes flutter open, "I honestly didn't know it was you. I... I tried to stop them. I have never liked that they bully people like that. Most of the time I do stop them... but that day I wasn't in the mood to keep trying... There were too many of them and all I wanted was to talk to you. I went back inside to look for you and when I came back they were all gone."

He runs his hand through his hair, "I saw you sitting there... But I truly didn't know you were crying. You... you looked at me and then looked away. I've always associated that with you being upset with me and you needing some time to cool off. You don't know how much I wanted to walk over to you and comfort you. But I thought it would only make it worse."

He raises his hand, and I see how much he's shaking. I freeze when his trembling hand lands on my knee. "I'm so sorry," he whispers. "You... you don't know how much you mean to me; how much I care about you. I've tried my very best to keep you safe; the only thing I can do is prevent people at school from talking bad about you. No one, I mean _no one_, talks bad about you in front of me."

He shakes his head, "I know when people talk about you, you get angry... So I feel like that's the only thing I can do; stop people from making you upset when they talk about you. But the one time you actually needed the help... I wasn't even there."

He squeezes my knee, "I'm so sorry," he whispers. "I have thought about you for the past three years, hoping and praying that you're okay; hating myself for not being there with you. All I've wanted for the past 10 years was to help." I let a single tear escape. He slowly reaches over and wipes the tear with his thumb, "Please let me help."

"You hurt me."

"I... I know I did. And I hate myself for hurting you. To be honest, I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't want to see me ever again. But I want you to know that I will do anything to make it up to you." he sighs, "It kills me that I hurt you... But what makes it worse is that I didn't even know. There are a million reasons for you to go, but if you find one reason to stay, I'll do whatever it takes to turn this around. I realize that I let you down but, if you give me the chance, I'll put us back together, whatever it takes."

I let his words sink in. I don't know if I can let him in again. The thought of having him back in my life both relieves and scares me. Remembering the good and bad days with him make me want to jump in his arms. Remembering the horrific days _without_ him make me want jump into his arms and hold him tight, but run away before _he_ can let go. I know his apology is sincere; I can see it in his eyes. He apologized for that one time...

But it wasn't just that one time. It was the only time they surrounded me, but the torment went on for what felt like forever. The only thing that stopped them was Gale. When we became hunting partners, we developed a friendship. After a while, we would walk together to and from school- the times when the bullying usually occurred. His glares scared them away. Yep, a 14 year old Seam kid scared off 18 year old blondes.

Yet, I waited for Peeta to rescue me. I was waiting for best friend to come back for me; realize his 'friends' are complete douchebags and that I'm the one who really cares. I know it sounds... _cliché_... but... He belongs with me.

I continue staring off in the distance, deep in thought, until Peeta moves his hand from my knee. He slumps over; placing his elbows on his knees, and buries his hands in his face. I watch as his body trembles.

"I'm so sorry," he sniffles.

_Is he… crying?_

"I know you don't believe a word I'm saying; that I'm a stupid town kid that cares about his reputation more than about who he loves. But... I...I l-" his voice cracks, "I love you, Katniss. You don't know how much I love you." He turns to me with tear-stained cheeks, "I need you; I need you to be safe. But I don't know if you're safe when you're not with me. I can't stand the fact that you're scared to be hurt again...by me... _because _of me… I-I don't want it to be this way. We protect each other, Katniss. Let me protect you. Let me care for you. Let me love you."

I don't reply, unable to process all that he has said.

"Say something," he whispers. "Anything; say anything." He sighs, "I told you I love you and you say nothing." He shuts his eyes, "I wanted words, and you gave me nothing."

"I love you," I mumble.

His eyes snap open, "What?"

"I love you," I breathe.

His eyes dart back and forth, as if they're searching for something. "You love me?" I nod my head slowly. He leans toward me with open arms, but stops quickly. His face is right in front of mine. He's so close, but so far... "But do you trust me?"

I swallow hard, "I..."

He moves closer, resting his forehead on mine, "Please trust me," he whimpers.

I slowly move my head back, letting me see his face. I take him in. His foreign but familiar blue eyes stare into my gray ones. His blonde hair is longer than I once remembered; it falls closer to his eyes. My hand unconsciously moves up to his face, brushing his bangs back into place. My hand rests on his cheek, my thumb rubbing it soothingly. His larger hand softly covers mine, squeezing it slightly. My body shakes; his grip on my hand tightens.

"I'm here; nothing is going to hurt you," he whispers into my ear.

_Did I not just tell my sister the same calming words?_

He lets go of my hand, "I won't hurt you," he mumbles.

My arms slowly wrap around his neck as I bury my face into his chest. He enfolds me with his arms, making me feel safe. I don't let myself cry because I know I have to say something.

"I'm sorry," I whisper.

His chin rests on my head, "There is nothing for you to be sorry about."

I shake my head, "It was stupid."

He squeezes me tighter, "No it wasn't. I hurt you."

"_They_ hurt me... Why did I take it out on you?"

He pulls back, grabbing my shoulders, "I didn't help you, Katniss. I understand why you were upset. I'd be upset if you didn't defend me. You don't need to try and make me feel better." He pulls a strand of my hair behind my ear, "_I'm _sorry. Besides, you shouldn't have to worry about making it up to me; you have too much going on right now. It isn't your fault that you have feelings, Katniss. It's _my_ fault that your feelings were hurt, not yours. Please don't feel bad. I've put you through enough… Just let me help you, okay?"

He's just how I remembered him; putting other people's feelings before his.

I nod and place my head back down on his chest. "Hold me," I murmur. He does so by embracing me once again. He lies with his back on the couch and I lay on top of him.

"I missed this," he says as he kisses my head.

"Me too," I mumble against his neck.

After who knows how long, Peeta falls asleep. His breathing slows, but the grip he has on me stays the same. I realize how much I truly missed him. He may have hurt me, but I know he didn't do it… _purposely. _Though we stopped talking, I don't think our friendship ended. He said he has loved and cared about me this entire time, and I with him; that's what friends do.

Not having Peeta to help me through all that I went through was pure agony. The night my father died, he told me that he was there and that it was going to be okay and that he was there… it reminded me of how it used to be. I felt so safe when he held me because I knew he was there for me; he _is_ there for me.

Peeta is there for me.

All I can hope for is that everything goes back to the way it was.

With my luck, though, I have a feeling things are only going to get more complicated.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading! Tell me what you think of it by reviewing and I'm so glad you guys are liking it. I'll try to update again this weekend... and I'm not sure if the reason Katniss was so upset is very good. Tell me what you think about that... because even I was a little iffy with that. :\<strong>

**REVIEW! :D**


	6. Chapter 6

**I know it's short, but I wanted to space it out. Thank you for the reviews; I super appreciate them.**

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><p>Chapter Six<p>

The last few days have been pretty decent for me. I've been eating a little more, and getting actual sleep. I haven't been too focused on the grief that _should_ consume me; I try and focus on Prim and Peeta instead.

Speaking of Peeta, I can't describe how grateful I am to have him back in my life. It's only been a few days and I already remember how good life used to be. He holds me sometimes, like when he knows something's wrong even when I don't. That's the thing with Peeta and I. We know each other well enough to understand if we need comfort or not.

He helps Prim, too. When she has nightmares, she likes to have him there with her. It bothered me the first night; am I not enough to keep my sister safe? But I then remembered that my sister has a piece of me in her; she longs for a rock to keep her steady. For now, that rock is Peeta.

I'm not so sure what 'rock' is. I mean, Peeta is my rock because he keeps me grounded; he's the only one that helps me through everything. I don't know why I call him my rock, though. I guess it's always fit him; he's very built, you know? He keeps me down, but in a good way.

I know what to call him figuratively; but literally?

Figuratively speaking, he's my rock; I love my rock.

Literally, he's something; I love my something.

What is something?

Something is friend.

_Peeta's my friend… right? Of course Peeta's my friend! Peeta and I are friends. Just friends. Maybe something more…? No! Nothing more. We love each other like friends; best friends! Like brother and sister! Okay, not brother and sister. That's too weird… You don't have daily inner conflicts about how you feel toward your brother. _

Okay, I have to admit, it's been confusing lately.

Peeta said it was his fault my feelings were hurt. Is it his fault my feelings are like _this?_

When he isn't with me, I can't go 10 minutes without thinking about him; it's ridiculous. When he is with me, I can't stop staring at him. If it doesn't scare him, it scares _me_. When he's close, I feel like I'm going to throw up, but I can't stand the fact that the feeling's going to go away. I love when he's smiling, especially when I'm the cause. I can't help but smile when I'm near him, and frown when he's not.

_I don't remember friendship feeling like this. _

The subject is too confusing! I usually get off of it before I can get too deep and reveal things I want hidden.

_I don't feel this way about Gale…_

Out of boredom, though, I usually get sucked right back into the matter of Peeta Mellark.

_Gale!_

I haven't spoken to Gale in maybe a week! I haven't been able to go see him for a week! Hell, I haven't been able to get out of this house for a week!

Suddenly, I feel crammed and trapped. The building feels too small; I need something open and free.

Before I can escape I run into Mrs. Mellark.

"Katniss," she says softly. "Are you alright?" I shake my head, bringing my hands to my temples, rubbing them hard. She nods her head, "Peeta will be home in a little bit, honey."

Yep, even she knows Peeta is the only one that can comfort me.

I shake my head again, not wanting to deal with those feelings again.

She furrows her eyebrows, "Katniss, Peeta will be home from school in less than an hour."

For once, I wish I went to school. Since the accident, I haven't gone to school. I know I should, but I don't care. The only reason I went before was to stay away from my mother. Now that she's not here… I see no point in going. Besides, no one's making me go.

She places a hand on my arm, "Katniss, you're shaking." She gestures to the nearest couch in the living room we're in, "Sit down." I do so and gently rock myself back and forth. "Do you need anything?" she whispers. I nod my head and slightly pat the seat next to me. She sits down cautiously, unsure as to what I want. "What is it, my dear?"

I turn to her, "Tell me the story of Otto and Hazel."

Her eyes widen, "What?"

I tuck a piece of hair behind my ear, "My father used to tell it to me when I had a bad dream. It was the only put me at rest. Please, tell me it. I know you know it."

She swallows hard, "Of course I know it."

She stands, shaking her head. I grab her hand out of desperation, "Please?" I whisper.

She nods her head and sits close to me as she begins the story. She tells me the story _exactly_ as father once told it; not one detail missed or added. Knowing the story by heart, I pay attention to her facial expression as the story goes on. She smiles brightly when Hazel and Otto declare love or one another. She cringes when she tells of Hazel's parents forbidding Hazel to marry Otto. She gives a mixed emotion when the end comes along. As she says the two run off together, she gives what seems to be a longing frown and a wishing smile.

"I'll be back in a little while, Hazel!" I hear Mr. Mellark shout from downstairs.

Mrs. Mellark completely ignores his comment as a single tear falls down her cheek, "And the both lived happily ever after," she whispers.

I stare at this woman in shock. I remember my father getting emotional over this story only a couple of times, but that was when he thought we were both asleep. I don't understand how this story could get to them like that. I mean, it's a made up story about a boy from the Seam named Otto and a girl from town named Hazel. What's the big deal?

_That's funny; Mrs. Mellark's name is Hazel._

I watch as Hazel Mellark takes deep breathes, staring at her own intertwined fingers.

_Isn't Mr. Mellark's name Henry? That has to be a coincidence, right? I mean, there's no one in the Seam named Otto!_

My eyes widen; my chest pounds; I let a slight gasp escape my lips. I turn to Mrs. Mellark, she looks broken and devastated. She knows that I've figured out the tale I was told as a little girl.

_My father's name is Otto._

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><p><strong>Tell me what you think be reviewing! I love the commentary and suggestions. Plus, I usually message back pretty quick. :)<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

I quickly stand up, but trip over myself and fall on my butt. I scoot back, staring at her. "What the-" I mumble under my breath as I stumble into a standing position. I shake my head, trying to clear it. "No," I whisper to myself. "No!"

She stands up, "Katniss," she says cautiously. I push past her, flying down the stairs. She trails behind me, calling my name over and over again.

My hands shake as I make it to the empty kitchen. I walk by the table we ate at this morning, but stop at the end. I turn on my heels, staring at Mrs. Mellark. She stands a few feet away from me, closer to the door leading to the public area of the bakery. She watches me carefully.

"You loved my father?" I whisper. She nods her head, but quickly goes back to being numb. I knit my eyebrows together in confusion, "You loved my father... but you married someone else?" She nods her head once again. "Why?" She doesn't answer me. "Why?" I repeat. She shuts her eyes, refusing to look at me. "Why?" I nearly shout.

"I don't know," she finally mumbles.

"Yes you do," I say with a shake of my head. "You didn't marry him because your parents told you not to. Is that it?" I sharply exhale, "Is that it?"

"Yes," she sighs as her eyes flutter open. 

My cold hand meets the back of my hot neck, "It's all true?" I ask. "The whole story... is it all based on things that really happened?" She looks at the floor as she nods. I shake my head and shut my eyes, beginning to talk to myself, "If you just take off the happy ending, and add five kids... you get reality..." My eyes snap open, "Did you..." I shake my head. "It was _all _true?"

"Yes," she whispers.

"Even the parts about..." I trail off, trying to remember the story; my mind is lost. "After you and my father were both married... did you really..." I swallow hard, hoping she gets what I'm saying. 

"Yeah," she nods her head. "We did."

My eyes widen; I roughly clamp my hand over my mouth to stop a sound of surprise and disgust. Being the person I am, though, I automatically think of a way to make her feel worse.

My hand slowly lowers, "Oh, that makes sense," I snort. "Mommy a Daddy said you couldn't marry the guy, so you decide screwing around with him would be just fine."

"Katniss!" she shrieks.

"No! Don't '_Katniss_' me!" I push my fallen hair over my head. "You were married! No, you _are_ married! And he was married!" I shake my head. "You, a married woman, screwed around with a married man! What... what is wrong with you?" 

She frowns, "I don't know," she whispers.

I place my hands on my hips, "Of course you don't," I murmur under my breath. I turn to my left and stare at the kitchen appliances, unable to look at her when I ask, "Was it still going on when Julian was born?" 

I cringe as a soft, but stomach turning, "Yes," escapes her lips.

"When I was born?" I whisper.

"Yes," she repeats.

I sharply inhale, "If-if the story is aligned with real time... Well, let's see... in the story, you-you two run off together a few months after Otto- I mean, my dad got married... But you were already pregnant with his child and-" I gasp, turning to her with widened eyes. I shake my head as my hands clasp together, shaking up and down, "Please," I beg. "Please, oh please, tell me I don't have a half-brother."

She slowly lowers herself into the nearest chair, "I don't know."

My arms fall to my side, "You don't know?" She nods her head slowly as she buries her face in her hands. "Could... could either one of them be related to me?"

She looks up at me through her fingers, "You could have three half-brothers for all we know."

I furrow my eyebrows together, "Three? What do you mean thre- Oh no."

_Peeta. _

I rub my temples roughly as my breathing becomes more labored. I breathe in and out of mouth, trying to calm myself.

"Katniss," she says. "Katniss, are you okay?"

I glare at the idiotic woman. "No," I say through gritted teeth. "No, I'm not, actually." My hands form fists as they continue pressing on my forehead. "My father is dead; my mother is dead; I moved in with you people!" I say pointing to her. "I just found out my childhood bedtime story is based on true events that included my father and you doing… _things!_ And... and..." I throw my hands in the air, "I could be in love with my half-brother!" I scream.

She quickly stands up; the chair she was sitting on falls. "You're what?" she screeches.

I shake my hands, trying-but completely failing- to calm my nerves. "I don't want a half-brother," I hiss. "Oh," I gag. "Oh this is sick!" Dropping to my knees, I hold my stomach tightly, "I think I'm going to hurl," I heave.

"Just breathe, Katniss," she tells me, trying to soothe me.

I rock myself, "Just kill me now," I whisper. "Just take one of your stupid frying pans and kill me now."

"Katniss, calm down," she continues.

I smack my hands on the ground and force my head up, "I _can't_ calm down!" I scream. "I could have a half-brother!" I shut my eyes, "A half-brother I could be in love with," I murmur to myself.

"What do you mean, Katniss?" I hear an innocent voice ask. "What do you mean you could have a half-brother?" I swallow hard as Mrs. Mellark moves out of the way, revealing Prim standing at the door with the Mellark boys standing next to her. "Does that mean I have a half-brother, too?"

Julian furrows his eyebrows, "Mother… what is Katniss talking about…?"

Mrs. Mellark looks back down at me, then to her sons, "Uh…"

Prim tilts her head to the side, "Are we related to the Mellark's, Katniss?" she asks.

I grab onto the nearest chair's legs, and use them to stand up. I slip slightly, causing a few things on the table to fall.

"Katniss," Mrs. Mellark says, redirecting her attention to me, "Settle down."

"I can't breathe," I whisper. My body shakes as I rise. "I can't breathe," I repeat.

"Then sit down," she hisses.

"I need to get out of here," I say, walking backwards. I look around the room, "How do I get out of here?"

"Katniss," she shakes her head, "You can't leave, honey. You're not feeling well."

My back hits something; I turn to see the door. My trembling had reaches for the door knob, and it takes me a while to actually turn it.

"Katniss, what's wrong?" Prim ask just as I finally manage to swing the door open.

I squint my eyes, trying to see outside. I easily jump the steps as I continue looking around.

"Gale!" I gasp.

He quickly turns around, "Catnip?" he says, obviously surprised. I take a few wobbly steps to him, but once he realizes something's wrong, he rushes to me. "Are you okay?" he asks as he grabs my arms, holding me up.

"No," I whimper.

"What happened?" he asks, probably trying to figure it out.

I shake my head, "We have to go," I tell him. "We have to go now."

He knits his eyebrows together, "Go? Go where?"

"Anywhere but here. But we have to go _now._"

"Why now?"

"Because, Gale! We have to go _now_!"

"Fine," he sighs, "Where would you like to go?"

"Away," I say quickly.

"Away?" he asks.

"Yeah. _Away, _away."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That's supposed to mean we're leaving."

"Leaving to the forest…?"

"No, leaving the District."

His eyes widen, "Katniss, you know I'm the first to volunteer to get the hell away from here… but where do you suppose we go?"

"I don't care! I really don't care! I just have to get away from here and from, and from, and from them!" I scream pointing to the bakery.

His eyes follow my finger, and quickly come back to me. He takes a slight step back, "The Mellark's?" He laughs, "What's so bad about the perfect merchant family?"

I shove him away, "Oh, there anything but perfect!" I snarl.

He raises an eyebrow, "Really? C'mon, Katniss! We're talking about the _Mellark's!_ How can the prissy family _not_ be perfect?" I stare at him, frowning. He grits his teeth, "What did they do to you?" I shut my eyes, shaking my head. "What did they do to you?" he repeats with more power and anger in his voice.

"Do you remember that story our fathers used to tell us?" I whisper. "The one about Hazel and Otto?" I ask louder.

He flicks his hand, "Yeah, yeah, the one about the two people falling in love and running away together. What about it?"

I sigh, "It isn't fake."

"Of course it isn't fake," he laughs. "It's a folktale, Katniss. All of those things are based on something real. It was a long time ago, though."

"No, it wasn't. That story was still going on when we were born."

"What do you mean…?"

"I mean, during a certain part of the story, we were already born."

"But… who was it? I think I'd remember someone running off against their parents will."

"But they didn't run away, Gale."

He tilts his head to the side, "What do you mean? That's a part of the story, isn't it?"

"They messed with the story so there would be a happy ending. That's not how it really played out."

"Well… how does the story really play out?"

I take a deep breathe, "Hazel stays married, and she has three boys. Otto stays married, and he has two girls. Later on in life, Otto dies in a mining accident, and his wife is murdered soon after his death. Their two daughters somehow manage to stay with Hazel and her family. Otto's eldest daughter figures it all out, though; she figures out that her bedtime story is real… and that her father and this woman she's staying with took place in the actual events."

"Wow," he breathes. "That's… _a lot_ different than I remembered. I wonder how Otto's kid figured it out, she must be really smart if she-"

"Hazel is Mrs. Mellark and Otto is my father," I blurt out.

I stare at the ground as I hear him stutter, "W-w-w-what?"

"Yeah," I whisper. "That's what I said."

I look up to see him shaking his head, "That-that- that means the baker's wife…" he points to the bakery, "and your father…" he points to me, "were screwing around..." I nod my head, still waiting for his real reaction. "But in the story, didn't Hazel and Otto have a kid together- oh shit."

"Do you understand why I was freaking out?"

He shakes his head, "It could be a piece of the story they messed with! You don't know if that's real or not!"

"But I do!" I shout. "I talked to her! She told me herself that…" I shake my head, "She said I could three half-brothers for all we know."

His eyes widen, "All three of them?"

I nod my head, "All three of them."

"No!" he objects. "You can't be related to them! They're all ass-wipes!"

"I know, Gale! But I can't choose who I am and am not related to!" I wipe my face, sniffling, "And that's not even the worst part!"

He takes a step back, "What's worse than being related to a Mellark?" he growls.

"Being in love with one!" I scream.

His fists clench, "You're in love with one of them?" he hisses.

"Yeah, I kind of am. And he might just be my half-brother."

His eyes search my face, "You're lying."

"Yes, Gale," I scoff, "I made up this sick story as a joke."

"This isn't something to kid about, Katniss."

I glare at him, "Obviously," I spit.

He rolls his eyes, but becomes serious, "How do you know you love him?"

I shut my eyes, "I… I just do, okay?"

"No, Katniss, _not_ okay. You're supposedly in love with a Mellark; also known as one of the biggest assholes in all of District 12! That is definitely _not_ okay!" He shakes his head, "And he could be your half-brother, Katniss! Do you know how disgusting that is? You're in love with your asshole of a brother!"

I soak in his words as I drop to the ground, landing on my butt. I pull my knees into my chest as he continues screaming at me.

"Is that where you've been all this time? Making out with your brother? Huh? I've been worried sick about you for a week because your parents are both dead! Yeah, instead of mourning my own father's death, I was looking for you. But you were perfectly fine; screwing around with your _brother_."

"I'm sorry!" I shout. "I'm sorry I wasn't stable leave the stupid bakery! Okay? I'm sorry I tried to help Prim cope with our parents' death. I'm sorry I didn't see you when our fathers died. I'm sorry I didn't help you and you didn't help me. But I'm mostly sorry that I let Peeta fix me."

He stares down at me, "Let Peeta fix you? What the hell are you talking about?" I continue shaking, unable to say anything. "Katniss," he says with worry, "Katniss, are you okay?" I shake my head. "Catnip," he whispers, squatting down next to me. He grabs my shoulder, "Catnip?"

"Katniss?" I hear Peeta say my name. I look up to see him walking down the back steps of the bakery where the rest of his family and Prim stand. "Katniss," he repeats. He squats next to me; I turn to have his face extremely close to mine. Our lips brush as he says, "Are you alright?"

His face is the last thing I see before darkness takes over.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi! :) Sorry that I haven't uploaded in a while! I was actually planning on this chapter being apart of a longer one, but I couldn't bare letting you wait this long when I had a part done! I'm glad you guys like the story so far, and I hope it only gets better! I love the reviews :) They're actually the reason I decided to upload this today instead of later! hehe.**

**Enjoy! :)**

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><p>Chapter Eight<p>

I wake up; but I don't wake up.

My eyes aren't open, but I can hear and feel everything.

I know I'm on a couch; what I'm lying on isn't as flat as a bed, and-

I feel a thumb rubbing my cheek soothingly.

The feeling of human touch frightens me; I try to move away from it, but I can't. I try and open my eyes, but they refuse to show me the light.

I feel vulnerable; the person touching me could easily hurt me; or worse, they _couldn't_ hurt me. I'd like for them to just get rid of my problems by just ending it all.

_Wouldn't that be easier? Can't this person just take me out of this disgusting, sick, messed up problem that has become my life?_

When I hear their voice and inhale their distinctive scent, though, I know they would never do such a thing.

"Oh, Katniss," his familiar voice whispers. He continues stroking my cheek as he keeps talking, "I hope I was the one you were talking about," Peeta chuckles. "I _really_ hope I was the one you were talking about."

His hand slowly drops from my cheek as it follows the path down my arm. He sighs, sounding distressed, "It's pretty sad, you know. I mean, you just admitted to being in love with me." He joylessly laughs; I hear him slump down on the ground, "I say again, I _hope _you were talking about me."

I feel his hand grab mine, "Do you know why it's sad?" He repeats his laugh, "I'm talking to you like you can hear me."

_I __**can**__ hear you. You just don't realize that._

"Well," he says with a squeeze of my hand, "I'll say it anyway. It's sad because I've been in love with you since I was five years old. I remember when I first saw you; with your red plaid dress on, and your two braids instead of one. How I grew the balls to talk to you… I will never know. But what I do know is that I'm the most grateful guy on earth that I did. I know, I know, how the hell can a little five year old be in love?

"Well, it's been the same for years. I just can't seem to explain it. You… you just make me smile; inside and out. If I were to tell you this when you were actually awake, though, you'd say what you did when we were little."

He sighs, "I remember when I first told you that I loved you. I also remember how pissed you were. You just couldn't accept the fact that someone cares for you the way I do; even when we were six. Yet, when you finally acknowledge my love for you, you didn't understand that I meant it more than a friend. Hell, you _still _don't understand.

"I've been in love with you for ten years. And I don't think you'll ever understand. I swear if you were awake, you'd wished you never woke up. But you know what? This is the first time I've said this all out loud. And I'm really glad it's when I'm saying to you; despite the fact that you can't hear me. I mean, I've talked to Rye about it… he knows how I feel about you… but I've never poured it all out to him, you know?"

He drops my hand, "Of course you don't know; you're asleep. I guess I've really lost it. I'm talking to an unconscious girl that I've been in love with since I was five, who might just be my half-sister. Wow. And I thought my love-life sucked before this."

His hand caresses my cheek softly; I shiver. His hand slips from my cheek as it lands on my forehead.

"Oh, Katniss," he slightly gasps. "You're freezing." He is only absent for a second; a blanket is tucked around me as soon as he returns.

I hear him sigh once again as his body moves closer. His hand slides behind my neck as I feel his face close to mine. His breath crashes on my face as our lips brush.

"I love you," his mouth mumbles against mine.

He barley parts his lips as they wrap around mine, giving me a soft kiss. It lingers as he slowly pulls away.

"I had to do it once," he mutters as he walks away.

Though I know he is gone, I feel the weight of his presence all around me.

Peeta was right; I wish I had never woken up.

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><p><strong>So? What do you think? Did you like it? REVIEW! Tell me where you want the story to go; I love suggestions. Now, I've said this before, REVIEW. I love reviews! They keep me going and they let me know what you think of the story. I really hope you like it and am looking forward to your feedback! <strong>


	9. Chapter 9

**I AM SO SORRY! It's been almost a month! I feel so bad, and I just want you to know that I'll try my very best to update more often for this story. I've been thinking that this story is moving a little slow... so I decided to have a few things come nice and fast in this chapter. I really hope you like it, and I want to know what you think. Please review! I'd just like to thank you all for being patient with me and reading my story. I know it isn't very good, but I'm glad I still have readers! The reviews and alerts mean so much to me! Speaking of reviews, I'd like to thank 'VMars lover' for my 100th review! I love you guys so much, and I REALLY hope this chapter is to your liking.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>Chapter Nine<p>

My eyes snap open as I sit up, gasping for air. My head throbs as my lungs attempt to fill themselves with oxygen.

"Gale!" I cry as he wraps his arms around me. He pulls back, searching my face once again. "Oh, Gale," I whimper. I speak quickly, sniffling, "I had the worst dream known to man. I ended up living with the Mellark's and I found out that the bedtime our fathers used to tell us was based on my dad and the baker's wife. Then she said that I was related to them. And then I told you that-"

His angry yet sad face stops me midsentence.

"It wasn't a dream," I whisper, "was it?" He frowns, shaking his head. I gasp, "Does that mean-?" My hand flies up to my lips, cautiously touching them.

He raises his eyebrows, "Does that mean what?"

Before I can begin worrying about my sanity, I remember someone more important, "Where's Prim?" I ask Gale.

"At school," he tells me.

"School?" I ask, confused. "But she already had school today…"

He shakes his head, "Katniss, you were out all night."

My eyes widen, "All night?"

He nods, "Yep."

He sighs, "You know how badly I want to stay here with you, right?" I nod my head, wanting someone familiar to be with me. "But I just can't." I frown. "I really need to go hunting. I was here all day yesterday after you passed out. I came by today and was lucky enough to see you when you woke up."

I sigh, "So you're going to the forest?" He nods. "Without me?" He frowns, nodding. My head spins as I attempt to sit up, "I can go too-"

Gale cuts me off, pushing me back down on the couch, "As much as I'd like that, you need to rest."

I groan, "I feel fine, Gale!"

He shakes his head, "Doctor's orders."

I furrow my eyebrows, "_Doctor_?" Last time I checked, there was no hospital in District 12.

He shrugs his shoulders, "Mrs. Mellark."

_That's right, I forgot about that…_

Mrs. Mellark is a healer, the closest thing we have to a doctor around here. Gale's about to say something else, but the loud thumping sound of footsteps interrupts him. He stands up, "I'll try to come back tomorrow or later today." I try to protest once again, but he rolls his eyes, "Just lay down for one day, Katniss." Due to my throbbing head, I reluctantly agree and watch him walk out of the living room.

The loud footsteps are closer, and I look up to see Peeta walking in to the room. I rub my eyes slightly, making sure my mind isn't messing with me. When his figure doesn't disappear, and in fact gets closer, I realize I'm not imagining things. I see that he has a bowl of water in his right hand, and a cloth in the other.

He smiles at me as he kneels on the side of the couch. I curiously watch as he places a piece of the fabric in the water, and brings it toward me. I flinch as he touches my face, remembering what may have or may have not happened last night. He delicately dabs the wet cloth on my forehead, cooling it down. I sigh of relief as my headache slowly fades.

"Better?" he whispers.

"Much," I mumble. He smiles at me again as he soaks the cloth in the water again. I tilt my head to the side, "Shouldn't you be at school?"

He chuckles, "Yeah, but I'd much rather be here taking care of you." I slightly smile, and close my eyes. "So," he says. "Are you… are you doing okay?"

"What do you mean?"

He sighs, "You passed out last night, Katniss. Are you okay?"

"You might be my brother," I whisper, shutting my eyes even tighter. He slowly takes the cloth off my head; my eyes flutter open. "You might be my brother," I repeat.

He sighs as he drops the fabric into the bowl of water, "I know." He shakes his head, "This is crazy. I mean… our _bedtime _story? How much worse could they get?"

"Trying to hide the fact that they had kids together." He opens his mouth to reply, but he quickly shuts it as he frowns.

Peeta sighs, "We tell each other everything, right?" I nod my head, unsure as to where he's going to take this conversation. He stands, and is about to continue talking when I pull my legs up to my chest.

I gesture toward the now empty seat in front of me, "Sit," I whisper. He nods and sits down in front of me. He faces me as he crosses his legs. "I don't want a brother," I mumble into my knees.

I see Peeta play with his fingers as he whispers, "I don't want a sister." He sighs, "It'd just be…"

We wrinkle our noses as we say at the same time, "_weird_."

I shake my head, "I just don't see you like that… I see you as something… _different_."

He raises an eyebrow, "Well then how do you see me…?"

I swallow hard, not wanting to talk about my newfound feelings for Peeta, "Not like a brother," I say truthfully.

"That could mean a lot of things…" he says. I nod my head as he continues, "We're friends… how much different would it be if we were siblings?"

_If we were siblings, what might have happened last night would be __**incest**__. _

"I… I don't know…"

"I do," he mumbles.

I pretend that I didn't hear his comment as I ask, "Is anyone else home?"

He shakes his head, "Nope, it's just you and me."

I nod my head, "Just you and me…" I sigh, "How are we going to know if we're brother and sister?"

He shrugs his shoulders, "I don't think there's a way of really telling."

I play with the end of my braid, "I can't go without knowing if I'm related to you or not."

He nods, "I just… I can't imagine us being brother and sister, you know? I… I don't see you as a sibling, you know?"

"Oh, I know," I mumble.

He sighs, shaking his head, "I don't think you do."

I furrow my eyebrows together, "And why is that?"

He shakes his head again, "Nothing, never mind."

I lean forward a bit, "No, tell me." He's about to object when I interrupt him, "We tell each other everything, right?"

He sighs, "I don't see you as a sibling because I see you as something completely different."

"I know; I feel the same way."

He runs a hand through his hair, "I'm pretty sure you don't." He stares at the television screen that isn't even on.

"How do you know that?" I whisper.

He covers his eyes with his hands as he rubs his temples, "Because the way I feel about you is definitely not the way you feel about me."

"And how do you feel about me?" I ask, both scared and curious. When he doesn't respond, my chest clenches as the anxiety in me begins to grow. "Peeta," I choke out. He looks at me through his fingers. I take a deep breath, "What… what happened last night?"

He swallows hard, "Wha-wha-what do you mean?"

"When I was on the couch last night, did anything happen?"

He shakes his head as his hands slowly slide down his face, "No," he says, "nothing happened…"

I turn my head toward the floor, whispering, "So that means I was just imagining it." I reach up and touch my lips, carefully tracing the outline of them.

His eyes widen, "Oh, no," he whispers, "You… you were awake?"

I drop my hand, turning to him, "You lied to me?"

He blinks a few times, "You were awake?"

"You lied to me?"

He opens his mouth, but quickly shuts it. He sighs, "Well… technically… yes… but you were awake?"

I nod, "Yeah…" I rub my arm, "So…so that means it wasn't a... a…"

"A nightmare?" he grumbles. "No, it was real."

"A dream," I whisper.

He shakes his head, "I'm sorry… I thought you were asleep…" He seems nervous and upset. "And that you couldn't hear me…. and…"

Silence.

He sighs as he looks me straight in the eye, "I meant every single word, you know."

I look away, unable to stare into the brilliant blue of his eyes for too long. "I know. You wouldn't say that if you didn't mean it."

I hear him shift his weight closer to me. "Don't hate me."

I turn back to him, "Why would I hate you?"

"I don't know," he whispers. He shakes his head, "Just… just don't hate me. Okay?" He takes a deep breathe, "You can tell me that you don't feel the same way," his voice cracks, "and that you're a little freaked out that I've been in love with you since we were five… but… just…" He reaches out and delicately lifts my hand and entangles our fingers, "Please don't say you hate me."

I stare at our hands, "I don't hate you."

He sighs of relief.

"And I'm not freaked out that you've… that you've… that you've felt this way since we were five."

His head tilts to the side like a confused child, "Really?"

I slowly nod, "Yeah. I'm just… _shocked_."

"Why _shocked_ but not _freaked out_?"

I slightly shrug, "I'm shocked because you were able to figure out your feelings at such a young age, and were so confident about it, too. I mean, I'm still confused about mine…"

His eyebrows knit together, "Confused about yours…as in what?"

"Confused as in… as in I don't like my feelings. I know what I feel… and I definitely know why… but I just don't want to feel this way."

"What way?"

"I…" I shut my eyes, unable to conjure my thoughts into words. Though I know what I feel, I just can't manage to say it out loud. I said it to his mother, why can't I say it to him? Maybe because I'm afraid to admit it. If I admit it, then it's official. And if we're siblings, and it's official that I truly feel for Peeta way more than a friend… then… then…

He squeezes my hand, "We tell each other everything, Katniss. Hell, I just told you last night that I'm in love with you. Do you know how hard that was? I mean, yeah, I didn't know you were listening… but I told you. And you know that I'm in love with you, Katniss. And-"

"I feel the same way."

Peeta is about to continue lecturing me when he realizes that I said something. His eyes dart back and forth, "You what?"

"I feel the same way."

He moves closer to me, "You feel the same way?" I nod as he moves even closer. "As in… you… you…"

"Yeah, Peeta." He settles right in front of me as I finally voice what has been trapped inside of me for a very, _very_ long time, "I… I love you too."

He hugs me, and I hug back. He pulls me into his lap as I wrap my legs around his waist. I nuzzle my face into his neck, finding comfort in his proximity. Usually when Peeta and I are this close, we're soothing each other, but this hug is not based on support. We've just admitted our true feelings for one another. We're together not because we are sad and need comforting, but because we love each other and know we are the only two people who _can_ comfort each other.

"Please tell me this isn't a dream," he mumbles into my hair.

I slightly pull back from our embrace, and brush his bangs back into place, "If last night wasn't a dream, than neither is this."

He smiles at me, and his eyes travel down to my lips and back up to my eyes. I swallow hard as I do the same, seeing his perfect lips are brushing up against mine. Our eyes lock; I'm staring into the perfect shade of blue again. Though we've been this close before- Peeta _did _kiss me last night- I can't help but feel nervous; my stomach flutters as his lips open just slightly. I unconsciously do the same thing, and move even closer.

Our eyes close as our lips begin moving together. It's better than last night; I'm actually working with him too. Though I have no idea what I'm doing, it feels good. Peeta shifts himself, and moves to his knees. With my legs still wrapped around him, and our lips still latched together, I am pressed closer to him. My hands play with the curls of his blonde hair as Peeta moves me down onto the couch. We break apart, finally able to breathe, and I lay completely down on my back.

"Katniss!" I hear Mrs. Mellark's voice from downstairs. "Katniss!" she screams; her voice sounds more desperate as it comes closer and closer.

I ignore it completely, thinking I'm merely hearing things, as Peeta moves on top of me. I grab onto his blonde curly hair, and crash our lips together once again. This time it's different, though. We are rougher, and Peeta's body pressed on top of mine brings me fire. There is a passion I've never felt between the two of us.

Suddenly, I hear Mrs. Mellark closer than she was before, "Katniss you have a brother-oh my- what are you two doing?"

Peeta and I pull away, our heads snapping in the direction of the doorway. Mrs. Mellark stands there, her eyes widened and her mouth dropped. She holds a paper in her right hand, which falls to the ground as her hands fall to her sides. My brain finally registers what she said.

"_Katniss, you have a brother"_

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><p><strong>I hope you guys liked it! Again, PLEASE review! And if you have any suggestions as to where you'd like the story to go, PLEASE tell me! I honestly don't know EXACTLY where to take the story, so anything will help! I love my readers and their reviews; you guys are why I keep going! :) thank you so much.<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**I'M SO FREAKING HACKING SORRY! It's been over a month and though I've been extremely busy, I updated my other story. I wanted to update this one so badly, but I just needed inspiration, which I didn't really have until today. It's not very good, and for that, I apologize again. I'll try to update soon, but I don't know what I should do, or if anyone is even interested anymore! :( Sorry again!**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>Chapter Ten<p>

Pushing the weight of Peeta off of me, I sit up. I hear the thud of Peeta hitting the floor. I take a deep breath, which ends up sounding like a gasp. Though he's off of me, I feel like my chest is being crushed by an extreme weight. I try to say something, but all that comes out are awkward chokes that suggest I need to breathe; I can't breathe. Soon Peeta is at my side again, holding my hand, begging me to take deep breathes. I feel like throwing up, but I know there is nothing _to _throw up.

"Get her some water!" Peeta screams. Mrs. Mellark nods and rushes down the stairs. "You're okay," he tells me. He squeezes my hand, "Just calm down." When his mother returns, she hands me the glass of water. I shake my head, not wanting water. "Yes," he nods, nearly forcing me to drink it. "It'll make you feel better," he says gently. I comply; Peeta knows best.

When I finish, I actually do feel a bit better. My breathing slows, but my head aches, it throbs, actually. I shut my eyes, and reopen them. I nearly scream when I see Mrs. Mellark squatting next to Peeta. I had to have imagined what she just said. I had to.

"Katniss," she whispers, reaching for my hand. "Katniss I have to tell you something." I pull my hand back, and wrap it around Peeta's neck. She swallows hard, "Katniss, I… I know how stressful my news has been for you lately, but, um, I think you need to hear this." I shake my head. I don't need, nor _want_, to hear this. She ignores me. "I was looking at records I have of the boys… and records I have of my personal life- a diary." She clears her throat, "In my diary, I have the dates of events that can possibly tell us who you're related to." She takes a deep breath and holds up a paper that looks to have been ripped out of a book. "This says that I was with your father _and_ Peeta's father nine months before Peeta's birthday." My hand slowly slips from Peeta's neck. "It says the same for Rye."

"You're wrong," I whisper. "I'm not related to either one of them."

She shakes her head. "We don't know that for sure, honey."

"Don't call me that," I hiss.

"Sorry," she mumbles. "But Katniss, you need to understand that there is a possibility that you could have a brother."

"I don't want a brother," I say, sitting up.

"I know you don't," she tells me. "But there's a-"

"A possibility," I interrupt her angrily, "I know." I stand up and begin walking away.

"It's not my fault, you know," Mrs. Mellark says.

I stop, scoffing, "Are you kidding me?" I turn around, facing her. "Did you just say that?" She nods, and I shake my head. "You're inane. Of course it's your fault!"

"It wasn't supposed to be this way," she says, still unmoved from her position.

I snort. "Of course it wasn't supposed to be this way! Want to know why? Because spouses are supposed to stay with spouses, not go off and make babies with other people's spouses!" I see how uncomfortable Peeta is, and I feel a bit bad.

I run down stairs, and run into Mrs. Mellark in the kitchen. He seems upset, and I just know it's because of yesterday's events and what they've revealed.

I mumble an apology, but all he says is, "No, it's not your fault."

_I know._

Hearing Mrs. Mellark screaming after me only encourages me to leave. "I won't tell her where you went," he whispers to me. I look up and furrow my eyebrows at the man; I never speak more than a handful of words to him. "Go on, I know where you want to go. I'll say you ran into town." Before I can thank him, he pushes me out the door.

Without hesitation, I break out into a sprint. Mr. Mellark said he knew where I wanted to go; it's obvious. I'm only ever truly at peace in the woods. I pass several people, but no one even bothers to try and talk to me. I'm soon at the fence, and I slid under it easily. I pick up my bow and arrow and my bag then continue running.

Out of frustration, I aim at things I shouldn't. I'm not out here to find food, but I end up shooting down a couple of rabbits, squirrels and even birds. Not once do I slow down, though. Every time I bring something down, I merely run by it, pick it up and throw it into my bag. After a while, I skid to a stop in front of mine and my father's favorite spot. The lake.

I don't skip a beat as I throw my things and clothes on the ground and jump into the lake. Being only in my undergarments, I should feel a bit uncomfortable, which I do. But no one's here, so I slowly calm down. I swim around for a while, remembering how my father and I used to come out here. He taught me how to swim when I was younger, just like he taught me how to hunt.

I quickly become sad as memories of my father summon to my mind. As the need to sob hits me, I come to the bank of the lake, and begin crawling out. With no will to keep going, I flop on my back, staring at the sky. Again, I recall something my father and I used to do. I watch the clouds float, and decided which cloud looks like what animal as I once did. I can feel the hot tears sting my cheeks, and I quickly wipe them away.

"It wasn't supposed to be this way, she said," I say as if I'm talking to someone. "Isn't that obvious, though? No one would want to go through that!" I shake my head and sit up. "But it's defiantly her fault. I mean, how is it not?" I play with the mud around me. "If it weren't for her, there wouldn't be the possibility of me having a brother."

Sighing, I wash my hands. "I guess it's also your fault, too, isn't it, dad?" I look up to sky, and realize that my father did have a part in this. I undo my braid, and let the soft wind rush through my hair. "If you were here, you'd know what to do." I shake my head. "If you were here, I wouldn't even be in this situation."

"I know what you did wasn't intended to hurt me or Prim or anyone else… but seriously?" I cross my legs and run a hand through my hair. "It was our freaking bed time story! How could you sit there and tell us a story that was true? And that was about _you_?"

This whole situation has merely enforced my negativity toward love, marriage, and children. It all leads to despair, and heartbreak. Already breaking one of my promises to myself, I know it'll be hard keeping the others- that is _if_ I keep them. I stare at the perfect lake, deciding that I should bring Prim here and try to teach her how to swim. It may not go well, because when father and I tried to teach her how to hunt, she had a fit about hurting the animals. I'll try hard this time, though. Father would want her to enjoy it.

"Peeta could be my brother," I whisper. "Do you know how strange that is?" I look at the trees around me, seeing how the wind moves the branches only slightly. "You've always known that he or Rye could be my brother. That's why you and Mrs. Mellark stopped talking, right?" I stick my feet in the water, digging a small hole with my heels. "I know I'm right… When Peeta and I were younger, though, didn't you think about it? How I could be hanging out with my _brother_?" I shut my eyes tight. "How I could be _falling_ for my _brother_," I whisper.

"So it's Peeta," I hear a low voice say. I turn to see Gale leaning on a tree, staring at all of my stuff sprawled across the ground. "I kind of saw that coming."

I shake my head. "What are you doing here?"

He walks toward me and then sits next to me. "I went to the bakery to visit you, and they said you ran off into town. It took all I had not to laugh at their faces. I knew you'd be here."

_Of course he knew I was here. He knows me._

"Peeta knew you weren't in town, too. I could tell by the way he rolled his eyes when Mrs. Mellark told me." I nod, already knowing that Peeta figured it out the second I left. He slightly chuckles. "So when did you start talking to yourself?"

I slightly blush. "How long have you been standing there?"

He shrugs. "Long enough. Now why were you talking to yourself?"

I point to the sky. "I like to think that my dad was listening."

He raises his eyebrows. "You know you sound insane, right?"

I nod. "Yup. But what's even_ more_ insane is that I want to date my brother."

He shakes his head as he pokes my side. "Well aren't you a messed up little freak?"

I roll my eyes. "Yes, I know."

After wiping his hands, he ruffles my hair. "Now put some clothes on so we can see who's related to my little freak."

He stands as I furrow my eyebrows together. "What? No, 'let's talk about it'?"

He shakes his head as he grabs my hand and pulls me up. "I think you and your dad talked it out enough." Smiling, I walk over to my stuff. He chuckles. "I love how you're not awkward around me while you're just wearing a bra and underwear."

I roll my eyes. "You won't think perverted things, will you? I mean, you're like my brother."

He laughs as I start getting redressed. "I'm a guy. I'll _always_ think perverted."

"Turn around, you pervert" I hiss. He puts his hands up in surrender as he turns. "You may be like my brother, but it's still weird."

"I bet you wouldn't care if Mellark was watching!" he laughs. Growling, I reach forward and step on the back of his calf. Not expecting it, he tumbles forward, and falls straight on his face. I laugh as I slip on my boots, the last part of my outfit. He sits up, and spits out dirt. Wiping his mouth, he shakes his head. "I regret nothing."

Grabbing my things, I walk off, and he's soon behind me, still covered in dirt. "You dork," I laugh.

He slightly pushes me. "I made you laugh, though!"

I nod, smiling. "Yeah, you did."

He shrugs. "So it was worth it." I hug him from the side, thanking him. "For what?"

"For being an amazing friend."

He smiles down at me as we walk together back toward District 12. Gale is truly my best friend; my brother. I don't know what I'd do without him. I love him, but like a sibling, and it's the same for him. I know we aren't as close as Peeta and I, but I think that's because we don't love each other like _that_.

We laugh and talk as we walk back into town. I tease Gale when Madge, the mayor's daughter, walks by, and he does nothing but gawk at her. I want him to say hi to her, but he denies the feelings I know he has for her. Sooner than wanted, we're at the bakery, and I have to face what might be one of the most complicated things any human being could ever go through.

"You'll be fine," he tells me as we hug.

"You're a terrible liar," I groan.

He shakes his head. "I am not! Besides, I'm not lying! You're strong, and you have Peeta." I nod, knowing that Peeta can get me through anything. After tugging on my loose hair, he grins. "If you get through this, I'll talk to Madge."

I smirk. "Oh, it's on."

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><p><strong>It wasn't long, but it wasn't short. I hoped you liked it! I love you all and please review! I need the help! If you have any ideas, please message me! I got a lot of help on my other stories when I requested a buddy to keep me going, so I'm hoping I can do the same here! Please, please message me if you have ideas! Tell me what you think!<strong>

**Oh! And my friend and I recently got a twitter account. There's nothing on it, haha, but it would mean a lot to her and me if you followed us. Pretty please? victoria_marisa**

**Thanks again!**


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